Hey there Felix:

Since I live a gazillion miles from Michigan, I have an excellent excuse for not joining your men's group. If I lived in Your Fair City, I would give it serious consideration, out of curiosity and an earnest desire to support you and Cia in these interesting professional endeavors of yours.

But: I have been asked on other occasions to join men's group, and I have given the matter some thought -- because I like organizations of all sorts. What has caused me to eschew men's group is the realization that there are literally no qualities or insights that (1) I would want to cultivate and (2) I have in common only with men. For me it would be like joining a group for right-handed people, or people who are losing their hair, or eldest siblings. No doubt we would have common experiences we could discuss, but to what useful end?

The above may come across as obnoxious or dismissive in this medium, but I am in earnest, and I share my skepticism in a spirit of respect for what you are doing.
--Don
<mailto:dmk54@columbia.edu>

Hi Felix, thanks for the blog. The benefits of group discussion are well documented, and experience tells us we should try to treat problems before they arise.

My own attempt to help is a film called ‘Sons of the Fathers - Inside a Men’s Group’. Details can be found at my site http://www.fathersandsons.com.au The group were ‘normal blokes’, and the aim was to demystify men’s groups, educate people about their processes and protocols, and allow the men to tell their stories. Other aims included helping men connect positively with their own gender, and show that groups can be a step towards improved psychological health.

Depression, isolation and suicide are often referred to but little if anything is done about them, perhaps because sometimes the answers are too obvious; listening, empathy and expressing compassion. I believe, in fact I know, that groups are extremely helpful in this regard.